it hurt me from the skin to the subcutaneous tissue up to myocardium

it almost been a year since that incidence happened but it feel like it just happen. its my birthday, but he ruined up everything until i hate that birthday. i don't know what i feel right now. it all mixed up. sad, happy, worries, mad.. all in one. it will be few days till my birthday but it keep come across my mind. i just can't forget about it. things that happen almost a year ago that keep me in this situation.. my mum perhaps would understand me. for everythings that happened, it had change my life a bit. it turn everythings up and down. and thanks you for ruined my day and my life. perhaps i can forget about it and also about you. but to forgive you........i may take some time for recovery process...